Why you feel disconnected from creativity
And why it’s not your fault—but it is your move.
Yep. I know that look.
There’s a certain kind of ache that comes with feeling creatively disconnected.
You might not call it that at first. You just feel… off. Restless. Bored. Overwhelmed but under-inspired. You keep the house running, succeed in your work, and maintain your relationships, but something’s missing.
And maybe you’ve tried to dip your toes back in: a journal entry here, a sketch, a song, and a side project there, but everything fizzled. Or felt awkward. Or like a waste of time.
Have you met Barbara?
She’s the inner voice that wants things done right, or not at all.
So you stopped.
Here’s what I want you to know:
You’re not broken. Your creativity didn’t disappear. But something (or more likely, many things) got in the way.
Let’s name them.
1 | You were taught to value being useful over being expressive
This one runs deep. For a lot of us, creativity was something you earned the right to do after your real work was done.
The message?
Play is extra. Creativity is indulgent. And if you’re not good at it or can’t turn it into something practical, you should probably stop.
So you learned to prioritize what was measurable, what made sense, and what looked productive.
The cost?
You started ignoring the things that lit you up.
Barbara says you can be creative…
right after you reorganize the pantry and finally deal with that sock situation.
2 | Perfectionism got louder than curiosity
Perfectionism doesn’t just kill creativity. It stops you from even starting.
Because when the bar is “make something amazing” instead of “try something interesting,” you might not feel safe experimenting.
And when you stop experimenting, creativity goes dormant.
Creativity isn’t about how much skill or talent you have. It’s about giving yourself permission to play. If you’re waiting to feel confident or competent first, you’ll be waiting forever.
Barbara would like to remind you:
“If it’s not excellent, it’s embarrassing.”
(We kindly disagree. Loudly.)
3 | You’ve been in survival mode
Let’s be real: it’s hard to be creative when your brain is on fire.
Stress, burnout, caregiving, grief, and health struggles all take a toll on the part of you that explores, plays, and dreams. Creativity requires mental and emotional space.
If you’ve been focused on just getting through the day, it makes sense that your creative self has gone quiet.
Barbara whispers:
“Other people have it worse. Just power through.”
Your creative self responds: “I’m not a machine, Barb.”
4 | You’ve forgotten what creativity looks like for you
Not everyone paints. Not everyone writes. Not everyone wants to do theater or start a side hustle.
But everyone creates.
Creativity might look like:
Rearranging your space so it feels like you
Making up stories while walking the dog
Curating a song playlist that reflects your mood
Designing your planner layout with colors and flair
Finding a better way to do something and getting weirdly proud of it
If you don’t think you’re creative, there’s a good chance you’ve just been taught to ignore how your creativity actually shows up.
5 | No one is clapping (and that’s secretly messing with you)
This one’s uncomfortable, but perhaps honest: If no one sees it, is it worth doing?
We get so used to external validation (likes, comments, praise, measurable wins) that doing something creative just because it feeds us can feel... pointless.
But this is where self-trust starts: Can you make something without applause? Can you follow an idea even if no one understands why?
Your creativity might be quiet. But that doesn’t mean it’s not powerful.
Barbara:: “Who are you even doing this for?”
You: “Me. That’s the point.”
What to do with all of this
You’re not alone in this. Most people don’t lose their creativity. They just get disconnected from it.
If you want to connect with it again, here’s a place to begin:
Reflect on what used to feel creative before the world told you to be productive
Notice what you do now, that’s creative (but doesn’t get called that)
Give yourself permission to play (badly, inconsistently, or privately if needed)
Start small. Lower the bar. Then lower it again.
Let awkwardness be part of the process. It means you’re trying.
Read: How to make space in your week to experiment with creativity
You don’t need Barbara’s permission to reclaim your creativity.
She’s still allowed in the room, but she doesn’t get to drive.
Want help finding your way back?
If you’re ready to reflect, experiment, and design a creative rhythm that fits your life, I’ve got something for you.
What did you like to create when you were a child? Drop it in the comments.
New around here? Welcome.
At Intendify, we break life down into 12 key areas and offer guided paths to help you reflect, plan, and take action—so you can start living more intentionally, one step at a time.
It’s like having a life coach in your pocket, minus the awkward eye contact.
The Creativity life area HUB can help you reconnect, experiment, and make space for joy. No talent or big projects required.