Why your sense of wonder might be missing (and how to get it back)
That particular patch looks a little dry and prickly. Excellent choice.
At some point between childhood and adulthood, many of us misplace something important: our sense of wonder.
Not on purpose, of course. We get busy. We get practical. We get tired. There are bills to pay, laundry to fold, work meetings to survive.
You remember feeling wonder, right? That wide-eyed curiosity and awe, and that thrilling feeling of “Wow, the world is amazing,” starts feeling like something for kids, poets, or people on very expensive sabbaticals.
But here’s the thing: feeling a sense of wonder isn’t a luxury. It’s a basic ingredient of a life that feels vivid, joyful, and alive. Without it, everything starts to feel a little… gray. And not the cozy cardigan kind of gray. I’m talking about the “Is this all there is?” kind.
If you’ve been missing that spark lately, you’re not alone, and you’re not stuck. Let’s talk about why wonder fades, what it costs us, and most importantly, how to invite it back into your life (without quitting your job and moving to Bali, unless you want to, in which case, please send photos).
How we lose our sense of wonder (P.S. It’s not your fault.)
Feeling wonder is easy when you’re five years old and everything’s new. It’s easy when you’re exploring a new city, seeing a shooting star for the first time, or falling headfirst into a fascinating hobby.
But over time, a few sneaky things chip away at our sense of wonder:
1. Routine becomes survival mode
When your days start looking suspiciously like a photocopy of each other, wonder doesn’t exactly have room to stretch its legs. You’re too busy ticking boxes to stop and notice that, “Oh hey, the clouds look like a herd of galloping elephants today.”
2. We build walls around what we “already know”
As adults, it’s weirdly easy to think we’ve “seen it all” already. (Spoiler: we haven’t.) But when your brain decides you’re an expert on the world, it stops scanning for the strange, the beautiful, and the unexpected.
3. We grow an irritating fear of looking foolish
Kids don’t care if they mispronounce “hippopotamus.” Adults? We’d rather die than be seen marveling at the wrong thing or asking a “stupid” question. Wonder requires vulnerability, and that can feel scary.
4. We’re burned out and exhausted
When your energy reserves are running on fumes, wonder isn’t the first thing your nervous system prioritizes. Survival is. Wonder thrives in spaces where you have enough time and energy to actually notice what’s happening around you.
What happens when we live without wonder?
At first, you might not notice it. Life just feels... a little heavier. Maybe you're less excited about things you used to love. Maybe you catch yourself scrolling more, sighing more, numbing out more.
Without feeling a sense of wonder, it's easy to fall into:
feeling disconnected from yourself and the world
a persistent low-grade boredom or restlessness
cynicism or the sense that “nothing good ever happens”
relying on big, expensive experiences (like vacations) just to feel something
Here’s the truth: you don't need more stuff to feel alive. You need more connection to the world, to your senses, and to your curiosity.
The good news? You can start reconnecting today.
How to get your sense of wonder back (no passport required)
That feeling of wonder isn't something you have to chase halfway around the world. It's something you can practice right where you are, with whatever energy and resources you have.
Here’s how:
1. Slow down enough to notice
You want to feel it? Stop rushing and scheduling yourself to death. Just slow down enough for your senses to catch up.
Try this:
Walk somewhere without your phone. (I’m looking at you, Kim!)
Pause at random moments to just... look around.
Choose one thing (anything) and really observe it for 30 seconds. (Yes, even the chipped paint on the coffee shop table has a story.)
A woman once told me her favorite travel memory wasn’t from climbing a famous mountain. It was sitting at a tiny bakery, watching an old man tie up a loaf of bread with twine. The ordinary, when experienced with intention, becomes extraordinary.
2. Practice "micro-adventures"
You don’t need a plane ticket to spark wonder. You just need to shake up your normal patterns.
Try this:
Take a different route home.
Visit a museum, park, or neighborhood you’ve never explored.
Try a food you’ve never had before. Bonus points if you can’t pronounce it (I don’t mean the kind from a box filled with chemicals!).
During a busy season of life, I once challenged myself to find one "new to me" thing each weekend without leaving my city. I ended up kayaking a river I didn’t know existed and eating a grilled cheese sandwich with kimchi on it. 10/10, by the way.
3. Ask better questions
Wonder is fueled by curiosity, and curiosity loves questions.
Try this:
Let your inner journalist come out to play. Instead of saying, "I know," practice asking:
“What’s interesting about this?”
“I wonder why that happens?”
“What story is hiding here?”
I once stood on a street corner watching a woman arrange flowers at a market stall. Instead of walking past, I asked her about her favorite flower to arrange. Her eyes lit up, and I learned about this amazing flower called a ‘Bird of Paradise’. She took me inside her stall to show me her collection. That flower is my favorite to this day.
Bird of Paradise
4. Play with your senses
Wonder often sneaks in through the senses: smell, sound, taste, touch, and sight. But most of us live from the neck up, stuck in thought loops.
Try this:
Listen closely to background sounds wherever you are.
Feel textures around you: the bark of a tree, the grain of a worn table.
Smell your coffee or tea before you take a sip, like it's the first one you've ever had.
A client once told me she reconnected with her sense of wonder simply by sitting under a tree barefoot for five minutes a day. Not scrolling. Not thinking. Just paying attention to the feeling of the grass between her toes.
Yes, my inner child stood up and cheered.
5. Allow yourself to be bad at things
Perfectionism is a wonder-killer. Wonder thrives in messiness, awkwardness, and first tries.
Try this:
Pick something you're a total beginner at (drawing, dancing, cooking a new cuisine).
Give yourself permission to do it badly.
Celebrate the weird, the joyful, the utterly non-productive.
When I took a pottery class for the first time, I made something that looked like a warped cereal bowl. But I couldn't stop smiling the whole time. I wonder where that went? (See what I did there?)
In case you need a reminder
You don't have to become a different person to experience more wonder in your life. You don’t have to sell everything and live out of a van. (Though if you do, just know that I’ll be a little envious.)
You just have to be willing to:
slow down
get curious
notice the beauty and strangeness in the everyday
let yourself be surprised by the little things
Your sense of wonder isn’t something you lost. It’s something you can pick up again, anytime you want.
Maybe even today.
By the way, if you’re craving a nudge to explore a little more, I created a Travel curiosity map worksheet to help you rediscover the experiences that spark joy, awe, and excitement, and you won’t need a plane ticket.
Were you able to reconnect with your sense of wonder today? Tell us how in the comments.
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