How perfectionism kills your creative spark

And how to break free and create anyway.

I once took a watercolor painting class… I didn’t keep it up but I’d totally take the class again!

There are notebooks sitting on shelves all over the world that contain exactly three pages:

• The first page is full of excitement.

• The second page is a little more careful.

• The third page ends halfway down.

After that, the notebook stays empty. I don’t think it’s because the person ran out of ideas. I think that somewhere between page one and page three, they started thinking about whether it was any good.

I've seen this happen with sketchbooks, blogs, businesses, sewing projects, guitar lessons, and websites. The project doesn't usually end because someone loses interest. It ends because they start judging themselves before they've given themselves a chance to learn.

Why do we stop creating?

TEACHING MOMENT

Perfectionism vs. healthy striving

Healthy striving says, “I want to grow.”
Perfectionism says, “I need to prove my worth.”

One is expansive. The other is paralyzing.

🔎 A 2019 study in Psychological Bulletin found that perfectionism is linked to higher levels of anxiety, depression, and procrastination.

Perfectionism doesn’t drive success. It drives burnout.

Source: Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism Is Increasing Over Time: A Meta-Analysis. Psychological Bulletin.

Creativity needs freedom. Your brain actually has two different modes:

• Exploration mode – curious, relaxed, playful

• Evaluation mode – critical, cautious, performance-focused

You can't be in both at the same time.

Neuroscience shows that your best creative insights come when your brain is relaxed and wandering, not when you’re judging every sentence, brushstroke, or step (Beaty et al., 2015).

Source: Beaty, R. E. et al. (2015). Default and Executive Network Coupling Supports Creative Idea Production.

So, if you’re criticizing your ideas before you’ve even started? You’re cutting off your creative spark at the root.

When I first built this website, I wanted it to look professional and polished with clean lines and a modern feel. What I ended up with? Something that looked like a 1980s motivational poster. It was bright pink, my fonts fought each other, and the buttons screamed “crisis energy.”

Barbara, my inner critic, was appalled.

“If you can’t do it properly, maybe you shouldn’t do it at all.”

I nearly believed her. I almost quit, but I kept going. I redesigned. I revised. I played. I laughed. I started over. I won’t admit to how many times. (It’s more than 7!) But eventually, my site began to look (and feel) like me. It wasn’t perfect. It still isn’t. But it’s functional, simple, a bit fun, and completely mine.

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Read: Use micro-challenges to find your creative spark

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The spark is still there; it’s just buried under pressure

Perfectionism is sneaky. It tells you to wait until you're ready. But the longer you wait, the harder it gets to start.

So… start anyway. Not because you want to create something perfect. Not because you’re confident that you can. But because you miss yourself.

Talk back to Barbara.

When that inner critic pipes up with:

“You’re not doing this right.”
Try replying: “I’m not doing it wrong, either.”

When she says:

“You’ll embarrass yourself.”
You say: “Probably. But it’ll be interesting.”

You’re allowed to be playful, and you’re allowed to be a beginner.

Make “bad art” on purpose.

I mean it.

Set a challenge for yourself:

• Create the worst poem.

• Draw the weirdest tree.

• Write a journal entry with the most dramatic metaphors you can think of.

Why?

Because it breaks the spell. ‘Bad’ art gives your brain permission to breathe again. It reminds you: This doesn’t have to be good. It just has to exist.

Reconnect with why you create.

Creativity doesn’t need to impress anyone.

🔎 Research shows that even casual creative activities reduce cortisol (your stress hormone) and improve emotional regulation (Kaimal et al., 2016).

Source: Kaimal, G. et al. (2016). Reduction of Cortisol Levels Following Art Making. Art Therapy Journal.

You create to feel grounded, to express your individuality, and to reconnect with your inner child, even when it’s messy, especially when it’s messy.

Michelle Arseneault is a certified life coach and instructional designer who loves helping women understand why life feels harder than it needs to, and what to do about it.

“I believe small, thoughtful changes usually have a bigger impact than dramatic overhauls. Around here, you'll usually find me exploring the psychology behind everyday life, creating practical tools, or asking questions that help you see things from a new angle.”

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